Saturday, 14 March 2009

46. With danger boobs - pre-op blog entry

So, here I am. Less than 24 hours until I am sat in my own hospital room on the final countdown. I have been fine all day..all week actually but today I had a 'moment' when I realised the enormity of what I am about to do. I just talked myself round that women do this everyday, they survive and cope. I am fine now.

I have been gardening and completing paperwork today. Its been a weird but nice day, slow..long. I have just completely lost my appetite but at least I have eaten today..going to try and have some dinner when I sign off.

So, here's my list of things to take with me. I am not going overboard, I haven't read anyone elses list and I think I am being practical here.

Wash stuff/flannel
Wipes (useful for keeping cool and clean)
Hand gel (I am a bit of a germ freak)
Ear plugs
Alice band
Hair bands

Slippers/slipper socks
Jog pants (for going and coming home)
T-shirt (for going and coming home)
Undies (no bra though - lol!)

Gadgets & Entertainment
Mobile phone (now that you can use them in hospital)
Nintendo DS (keep the brain busy)
MP3 player
Puzzle Books

And that's it..if anyone knows of anything I should take but haven't listed - please let me know. I will log on tomorrow (Sunday) but not posting again until I am awake (which Chris will do for me - thank you honey x).

I know I will be nervous but I have no choice now, no control, no options other than to just go forth - go with the armour that is my strength and think about the blessing that I have been given.

And finally, some Thank yous..

Mum - thank you for doing your DNA test and for being so level headed about things.
Dad - thank you Dad for coming to see me this week and for talking with me.
Lori - my in-law mum - thank you for gathering so many bits for me and for your kindness throughout.
Bob - my in-law dad - thank you for being you and for supporting us.
BRCA Umbrella friends - thank you ladies..thank you for your continued kind words and for sharing intimate stuff, your lives, your feelings, your thoughts, your photos. It is a priceless gift and I wouldn't have made it this far without you all.
Selina Goodman - my genetic counsellor - you have been a peaceful oasis of calm every time we have talked. Thank you for understanding me.

And finally..

Chris - my wonderful, thoughtful, patient husband - I adore you, you have been through all the hard stuff, wiped my tears, held me when I have been scared, felt alone, talked sense to me, kept me grounded and stood by me through every wobbly moment. I love you more than I can tell or show you. You are my rock. I know you will love the new me as much as the old me and I love you for helping me through this - without you this would have been impossible. Thank you x

Whoa..okay folks..signing off now, going to the beach tomorrow for some fresh air, relaxing quality time with Chris and then taking my mutant ass to Derriford hosptial for and overnight stay and then some major danger boob removing surgery on Monday!


Jonesy said...

7 days in hospital - Did I use the things on the list?

Toothbrush - yep
Toothpaste - yep
Wash stuff/flannel - yep!
Shampoo - dry shampoo would be good instead, brush in and out.
Wipes (useful for keeping cool and clean) - visitors used them and I used them for face cleaning initially.
Hand gel (I am a bit of a germ freak) - didn't touch it but nice to have it there.
Bio-Oil - for the morphine itches
Tissues - used everyday and sat on overbed table.
Ear plugs - nope, no need really.
Alice band - had to beg someone else to brush my itchy hair after the surgeons turned it into a bush! Once brushed I wore alice hair band everyday
Hairbrush - yes, essential humanoid enhancing tool

PJs - only wore full on day one before surgery and bottoms on final day for comfort and no bum flashing on exercise route. I wore hospital gown which was made for breast surgery. Go with it!
Slippers/slipper socks - slippers useful.
Jog pants (for going and coming home) - yes
T-shirt (for going and coming home)- do-up the front only. Overhead no!
Undies (no bra though - lol!) - yes

Gadgets & Entertainment
Mobile phone (now that you can use them in hospital) - yes, updates, text, photos, blog (if you are allowed).
Charger - essential
Nintendo DS (keep the brain busy)
Charger - DS was a saviour at times.
MP3 player - didn't use it and took my wind up radio instead.
Notebook - didn't use it.
Puzzle Books - had one handy and used it regularly but concentration levels poor.
Pens - essential.

Wished I'd taken
Audio books.
Sweets :)