I spent hours in the hospital yesterday having my blood taken, swabs up my nose, my groin and mouth for MRSA testing, blood pressure, weight, height, filling in forms, answering questions and finally, a last chat with my BCN (breast care nurse).
She asked if I had thought about if the surgery went wrong or not to plan. I could wake up with one breast, no breasts even. Although it is not likely, I have already thought about it and I cannot control that. I would be upset for a little while but I know it would be temporary and I could have follow up surgery to fix it. That's all I can think about that really..no point worrying now, its too late..its happening on Monday.
I have to go into the hospital (Derriford) on Sunday evening at 6pm and stay overnight. My surgery will be 8-9am on Monday and I will be in a side room for about a week. The Primrose Ward is a cancer ward and it will really hit me that I have been very lucky but also a little guilty too. Silly? Yes, I can't help that I know, I have fought long and hard to know - to change my future. I just have to focus on being strong and a good patient. I was told that I am not to suffer in pain in silence, that pain meds will help me heal because my body will be relaxed.
I probably won't be on my feet until Thursday, so thats 3 days flat on my back, sponge baths twice a day by the nurses, the hot blanket for the first 2 days and morphine on demand. It all sounds okay. I can handle it.
There are some other major stresses going on in the background that poor hubby is dealing with and I think we are both just very, very worn out right now. CSA crap and money issues just don't make life any easier but we have to keep moving forward.
Well..time to get on with my day. Got a lot to do. I will probably post again tonight. My packing list will make a feature I'm sure. Mum-in-law has been amazing and gathered lots of bits for me to keep my overactive brain occupied. That will also help with pain management.
Lets hope its gonna be a walk in the park but I am ready for whatever happens.
: )
Friday, 13 March 2009
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1 comments:
MORPHINE!!!!!!!!! Loved it. You will do well. You are totally prepared for it. I understand the guilt too. Whilst I was in there were women having lumps removed, but you can't change where they are, and it's pointless to wait til you are there too. Really, really hope it goes well, and that your hospital experience doesn't suck too much, you should be asleep for a lot of it. :o)
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