Friday, 27 April 2012

83. Time to get Nipple-tastic!

Time, as it does, has passed.  It's been nearly a whole year since I last posted and, as usual, its been a mixed bag of life, adjusting, accepting and blossoming in the esteem department.  The revisions that were done a year ago worked out really well (indentations now gone) but there is still work to do and I popped back for a visit to my cheeky surgeon about two weeks ago to discuss the end.  Not any old end, the end of my surgery (I hope) apart from the tattoo maintenance that comes with reconstructed nipples.

For the first time there was no woman present, which I thought was odd but it didn't bother me and I was introduced to the young male assistant I assumed was a doctor in training. 

My comedy surgeon to young male Assistant: "Now this, this is a very tidy breast reconstruction!"

I was unveiled for his perusal.  The eyebrows raised and a pleasant or surprised look crossed his face (probably a mix of both, it was hard to decipher).  He didn't say a word for the rest of the appointment - maybe I scared him a little, I can be a bit motor mouth at times, particularly when feeling nervous or exposed!

My comedy surgeon starts to discuss nipples, how they will be made, explains how they will STICK OUT ALL THE TIME.  Yes, I know this, but it poses a problem.  I hate wearing bras since my reconstruction.  Nothing fits, nothing is comfortable.  You go without a bra for 3 years then try and put up with one all day god it is torture!!  Rip the bugger off at the earliest opportunity!  Bloody hate them - pretty things but not for me anymore.  And so the problem of permanently erect nipples.  How am I going to live with them?  I guess I will just have to let people stare and wonder what type of floozy I am to wander around without a bra on, letting my nips stand out for all to see, all the time.  Well, fuck them...fuck them all.  If they knew what I'd been through physically and emotionally in order to get them then they can friggin' well enjoy them too.  I am not covering them up all the time with a boa constrictor of a bra in order appease their narrow minds about women's undergarment choice.

To the procedure - here's a pic of how comedy surgeon will make my origami nipples:

Having done Graphic Design at college, this strangely reminds me of flat pack designs for packaging for toys but in real life, I've seen a friend's and they look amazing.  I just hope mine do to.  

As for boob plumping, I've been offered fat injections to make them a bit bigger but that might only last for 3 years, and the fat cells may not even take and I don't want to face anymore weirdness thanks.  I've decided that my vanity is not strong enough to want them bigger, despite old grievances about the loss of my perfect 36B breasts.  My new ones are lovely, forever pert, small but beautiful and they just need finishing off.  The ends of my 16 inches of back scars need rectifying again so that's booked in at the same time...UNDER LOCAL ANAESTHETIC!!  Local he said, where I am awake.  WTF? I did ask him if I would put him off with all my talking..and what if I sneezed?  I have no idea how this is going to work but he convinced me that I can in fact have myself cut up whilst I am awake..and I agreed.  Gas and air will be at the ready - maybe I need a training run on that to make sure I don't giggle my ass off (I can do that without gas and air) and end up with extra nipples.  I'm up for the challenge - at least I can keep an eye on them and, as comedy surgeon says, I will find it fascinating! True I guess.

So I await my appointment for the knife, again.  Hopefully my exams will be over and I can then get on with my summer and getting some areola tattoos done.  

The end is in sight.  Smooth and sticky out I shall forever be!