Sunday, 13 May 2012

85. Justification for Cleavage

A bit of someone else's cleavage. 
Cleavage.  I miss having cleavage.

I would like enough to

a) wear sexy bras again
b) be able to nuzzle into

If you lost yours wouldn't you want it back if you could?  Well, at least you would look at the offer before you shut the door on it, right? This is a sore subject for some who have had less than sucessful surgery like mine, through implant rejection or cancer and I have deep admiration for those that have been truly scarred for life.  Those women will not scorn me for my choice but rather rejoice in the fact that I have the choice at all.  The whole point of knowing my BRCA1 genetic mutation was being able to choose between life (minus original boobs) and the gambling game of my life and cancer risk.  I chose.  I also get to choose again. I have been given the opportunity to play around with fat transfer for breast augmentation.  I know I said I wasn't vain enough to get them done, but let me explain that when I have tried many a push up bra on (used to be my favourite), I get creases, like old lady boob skin crinkling, going on instead of the full breasty-breastiness of real boobs.  Basically my top bit is a bit empty of boob.  Fat transfer can sort all those bits out a little.

The procedure can take up to 5 hours, its not easy, bruises will be a-plenty on the first visit but the fat is stored for the 2-3 revisits top up injections.  My hourglass figure has become more pear shaped these days and when I put on a few pounds everything puts on weight except my new reconstructed LD Flap boobs.  They look great though, I should be happy but saying no to this would be like waving goodbye to 'beautiful, what you used to have boobs'...forever!!  How can I resist?  Oh the vanity of it all.  I suppose this is the question to myself, am I fully justified? Do I need it? Why do I need it? Just because it is offered to me, should I take it?  I suppose you need to lose parts of your body before you can answer that question.  The answer to myself is, yes. The body sculpting part isn't even part of my justification or reasoning.  It's all about the boobs. Simple.

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